Super Clydesdale?

By | October 4, 2012

I am what the cycling aficionados would refer to as a clydesdale.  I am 6′-2 1/2″ tall and weigh somewhere between 220 and 235 depending on the time of the year.  As the cycling season progresses, I get lighter.  During the off-season, I like to focus on yoga and strength training.  I do not have the classic cycling physique.  Despite this handicap, I am obsessed with climbing.  I love to climb!  I get bored riding unending flats.  When the terrain undulates, I attack the climbs and am thrilled by the descents.  I know my disability (size) prohibits me from being a fast climber and my computer proves this when my speed dips below 10 mph on long or steep climbs.

Despite my size, speed and lack of training (I am on pace to rice only 2,000 miles this year), I still believe that I am a climbing monster.  When I ride the local club rides, I pass people like they are standing still.  I choose to ignore the fact that many of these folks are twice my age and ride perhaps 500 miles a year.  My tiny little ego is fueled by every person I pass on these rides.  The other thing that climbs my cycling ego…  Showing up posers.  You know the guys.  They wear full matching kits, they ride the latest greatest bikes and shave their legs.  They tend to be rude and like to pass you at a full sprint to show how fast they are.  They are my biggest pet peeve.  They like to draft off of me on the flat.  This is really rude!!!  At the start of a climb, they stand up, sprint and blow by.  They did not count on the SUPER CLYDESDALE.  I gear down, find a rhythm and power up the climb.  Sometimes standing the whole way.  They always look so annoyed when I pass them.  Sometimes they stand to try to pull away.  Silly poser…  You cannot match the SUPER CLYDESDALE!!!  I will make you suffer.  I will make you gasp for air and taste blood in your mouth.  You will falter!  You will lose the race to the top!  HA HA HA!  You didn’t know we were in a race?  Too bad!  You lose anyway!

This video shows some Discovery contest winners win their dream of riding a stage of the Tour De France.  It is a pretty sweet dream, but my dream is to ride mountain stages.  Riding the entire course would be awesome, but the mountain stages are where it is at!!!  Sad to say the bigger guy is close to my size.  Was he SUPER CLYDESDALE?  No!  He folded like a cheap card table on the second of three climbs.  I can no longer live in denial.  He is just a regular clydesdale and so am I, but I will continue to live the dream.